THE SIXTH ONE

MURPHYISM #11: There is never any rest in Leavenworth - what do those Bavarian freaks do?

MURPHYISM #12: Fuck the business man! He denied my car loan. I was looking into getting one of those Volkswagon GTIs, y'know? How the shit am I supposed to afford one of those sweet little babies without some cash money? Yeah, fuck the business man!

Also: While The Murphy condemns the business man, we are unsure what loan The Murphy was unable to obtain; however, he is apparently very angry and annoyed by this situation.

THE FIFTH ONE

READ: Due to circumstances beyond the control of this council, these life-rules will no longer be revealed in real time. From now on, Murphyisms and all further bestowed knowledge are to be viewed for their imperative and pertinent historical, moral, and life or death purposes. As a learned student and teacher of Murphyisms, I ask that you utilize these teachings well, and I hope you remember the important words spoken here in the days to come. 

MURPHYISM #10: Sometimes the sun will set on your back -it's a really difficult thing to avoid, granted. Just paint some pictures. Usually that reverses the physics of things.

THE FOURTH ONE

MURPHYISM #9: Aggression: it's kind of like being pissed, or drunk.

THE THIRD ONE

MURPHYISM #7: The Murphy ordains that the New Fury is infinitely greater than the Old Fury. All hail his words. Explanation later.

MURPHYISM #8: You're still the one who's sick - buy some Nyquil.

See: Wal*Mart, CVS, your family practitioner.

THE SECOND ONE

MURPHYISM #6: Don't start a fire and walk away. That shit is just careless.